I think awkward is an understatement. Do you remember that goofy stage between 10 and 12. When parts were growing long and balance was kind of hard to maintain and even though you feel like you are still 7 or 8 you begin to notice that "scary" people look at you like your older.
It seems like 35 is about the same thing. I feel like I'm still 25. I can really tell no difference. I still run, play, and dance just as hard. I don't think I am even too much wiser than I was when I was 25. Well, maybe a little.. but I was quite sensible at 25 (but less patient). But when I sit with the 25 and under.. I feel OLD. I listen to the simplicity of life. "My husband is going to be this, my husband BETTER be like that...." (I've been married 3 times already... I'm soooo not relating) Or, "I'm think I will have 2 kids... No, I only want one.." (I have 4 and the oldest is already officially an adult - NOPE, not relating at all)
So, I try to hang out with the 40 somethings.. Conversationally, things gel well. They have children, most in the same age range as mine. Many have either been divorced or are miserably (oh, excuse me >>> HAPPILY) married. So, yes, I can understand. Then comes the line of demarcation - - - - - The 25 and under crowd are playing guitar and singing in the other room while the 40 somethings are complaining (oh, excuse me >>> discussing) health issues, children, marriages, and weight loss.
A tug DEEP in my soul urges me towards the laughter and guitar. ugh.. OK, CHER... act your age already! Sit STILL! Then, perhaps, they decide to go outside and ride 4 wheelers and shoot fireworks.. my Feet start to twitch.. the 40 somethings.. sit seriously around the table discussing the latest coffee substitute made from mushrooms and is full of antioxidants and keeps you regular. Oh my! Where do I truly BELONG!
Even though my life experiences make me more like 50 than 35. My heart and body are ready to run and play. It may embarrass my teenagers (well at least Lauren, Zoe loves it), but I dance whenever I can dance. I sing whenever I can sing (even when I can't) I run across rooms to pounce on my son. I twirl and toss broom stick handles in my front yard to the applause of my 10 and 4 year olds. I have even been known to wear pig tails when I'm cleaning house. Is this some sort of female "Peter Pan" syndrome? Or this just the awkward age of mid-thirties? **and as a side note**I am noticing "scary" people that look at me like I'm old enough for the things they imagine ** /em shivers**
I do stay OVERWHELMED.. most of the time. But I believe that is because I keep pushing my limits to the max.. always pushing ahead and heading towards a secret place I have seen in my dreams. I don't want to grow mentally old. I need my energy, I need my youth, I need to be me. The day I sit around and become "serious" is the day life SLOWS to a screech.
I never want to sit around a table discussing "oldness" with others: body aches, illness, fears, wayward children, & taxes... YIKES!
It seems like 35 is about the same thing. I feel like I'm still 25. I can really tell no difference. I still run, play, and dance just as hard. I don't think I am even too much wiser than I was when I was 25. Well, maybe a little.. but I was quite sensible at 25 (but less patient). But when I sit with the 25 and under.. I feel OLD. I listen to the simplicity of life. "My husband is going to be this, my husband BETTER be like that...." (I've been married 3 times already... I'm soooo not relating) Or, "I'm think I will have 2 kids... No, I only want one.." (I have 4 and the oldest is already officially an adult - NOPE, not relating at all)
So, I try to hang out with the 40 somethings.. Conversationally, things gel well. They have children, most in the same age range as mine. Many have either been divorced or are miserably (oh, excuse me >>> HAPPILY) married. So, yes, I can understand. Then comes the line of demarcation - - - - - The 25 and under crowd are playing guitar and singing in the other room while the 40 somethings are complaining (oh, excuse me >>> discussing) health issues, children, marriages, and weight loss.
A tug DEEP in my soul urges me towards the laughter and guitar. ugh.. OK, CHER... act your age already! Sit STILL! Then, perhaps, they decide to go outside and ride 4 wheelers and shoot fireworks.. my Feet start to twitch.. the 40 somethings.. sit seriously around the table discussing the latest coffee substitute made from mushrooms and is full of antioxidants and keeps you regular. Oh my! Where do I truly BELONG!
Even though my life experiences make me more like 50 than 35. My heart and body are ready to run and play. It may embarrass my teenagers (well at least Lauren, Zoe loves it), but I dance whenever I can dance. I sing whenever I can sing (even when I can't) I run across rooms to pounce on my son. I twirl and toss broom stick handles in my front yard to the applause of my 10 and 4 year olds. I have even been known to wear pig tails when I'm cleaning house. Is this some sort of female "Peter Pan" syndrome? Or this just the awkward age of mid-thirties? **and as a side note**I am noticing "scary" people that look at me like I'm old enough for the things they imagine ** /em shivers**
I do stay OVERWHELMED.. most of the time. But I believe that is because I keep pushing my limits to the max.. always pushing ahead and heading towards a secret place I have seen in my dreams. I don't want to grow mentally old. I need my energy, I need my youth, I need to be me. The day I sit around and become "serious" is the day life SLOWS to a screech.
I never want to sit around a table discussing "oldness" with others: body aches, illness, fears, wayward children, & taxes... YIKES!
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