Jiron

I am so relating to this song right now. Fighting a sense of loneliness and abandonment. I had to let go of my closest friend. Why? Because sometimes - "with friends like these, who needs enemies" I drew the line and now I have to sit behind it. Sigh....

Image by Kelly's Creation, S ong of Solomon 8:6, Seal on My Heart Today's church service was an incredible entrance to a new day and new life. I arrived right on time and slipped up to the prayer room to pray alone. This time the Holy Spirit prompted me to lay totally prostrate and to pray (this is often why I like to pray alone, btw) As I did, I was lead to pray that the Holy Spirit would make us worthy to become HIS living sacrifice, acceptable and pleasing. I also prayed about surrender. I prayed that HE would anoint us with the ability to worship Him. The Lord answers His own prayers :). Also, today for the first time in a while, I was given a vision; while of course, I ended up on the floor again. The vision started with me feeling oil being poured on my forehead (a small fine line of oil across my head and moving up to my hairline). When it reached my hair line I felt a large hand rest on the top of my head. That is when I could see a TALL (over 6 ft) candle coming up fro...

I bought a birthday gift for a friend today and had it delivered. Just 2 minutes ago I felt a stirring in my spirit. I KNEW they were receiving it, right at that moment. So I said a prayer of blessing over the gift and checked the fed ex tracking number. Sure enough it showed delivered at 2:22 and by 2:30 I sensed them opening it. Isn't that cool? The spirit world is amazing.

Last Tuesday the assistant pastor of my church had a vision during our small group study that he said pertained to me. He saw a dove flying upside down with the branch in it's beak, just like what is depicted when the dove returns with a branch to Noah's ark. What is that suppose to mean? He also anointed me to interpret dreams and visions. He said this was one to get the ball rolling. Go figure. Why not something like... hmmm... oh never mind.. all visions and dreams are weird in my opinion.

A new friend sent me this picture yesterday. I printed it out and had a flood of emotion while looking at it. It is such a precious image. It's odd because, I just told a group of friends the other night that "I am just a baby". Someone spoke up and said.. "no you're not"; but I really felt like he didn't understand. The closer I come to knowing God the more I feel like a little infant. It's not the same as being immature. It's a matter of being TOTALLY dependent on Him and really not caring about impressing people any more. Life is teaching me that it does no good being too big for my britches all the time. In church, in worship, in my personal walk .. I always see myself as a baby with so much to learn. The more I learn the more I see that there is more to learn which leads me to further acknowledgment of my "smallness". This picture really lets me SEE, that the least of these is the greatest in the Kingdom. It's funny how totally...

Tonight in life group we were lead by the Spirit of God to pray for our church leaders and the church in general. The message was one of love. I realized that it is not only knowledge that puffs up. .but the gifts can do the same. But what is it all about really? Not how many gifts are revealed on a Sunday, although gifts ARE pretty awesome!.. but LOVE. To find the vein of Love coming from the Father and then pouring out a love transfusion to the world around us. I find that HIS presence humbles me, and His love lifts me up and leads me to not just cherish the ones I know, but the stranger in the seat a few rows away. True Revival, Eternal Revival, begins with Authentic Love. Authentic Love I fell on my face, bowing to the ground Why have I found favor in your eyes that you should notice me For you have comforted me and have spoken to the heart of your maidservant under Your wings I have come to take refuge! You are my hiding place and my shield; I hope in Your word Oh, how love You...

It is by being cast down and not destr oyed; it is by being shake n to piece s, and the piece s torn to shred s, that men becom e men of might , and that one a host; where as men that yield to the appea rance of thing s, and go with the world , have their quick bloss oming , their momen tary prosp erity and then their end, which is an end forev er. - - Beech er " Measu re thy life by loss and not by gain, Not by the wine drunk , but by the wine poure d forth . For love' s stren gth stand eth in love' s sacri fice, And he who suffe rs most has most to give. " By Mrs. Charl es E. Cowma n from Strea ms in the Deser t

Do not think that because you can see me that you see me. I am just as hidden as she is. Seeing is not really seeing. If only it were just a matter of outward appearance. Do you really believe you are seen as you appear? You are not and neither am I. Some days I do wish people could only see my eyes. I believe that would be more true.

Who is this who comes up from the wilde rness leani ng upon her belov ed? There fore, behol d, I the Lord God will hedge up her way with thorn s; and I will build a wall again st her that she shall not find her paths . And she shall follo w after her lover s but she shall not overt ake them; and she shall seek them inqui ring for and requi ring them but shall not find them. Then shall she say, Let me go and retur n to my first husba nd, for then was it bette r with me than now. There fore, behol d, I will allur e her and bring her into the wilde rness , and I will speak tende rly and to her heart . And I will betro th you to Me forev er; yes, I will betro th you to Me in right eousn ess and justi ce, in stead fast love, and in mercy . I will even betro th you to Me in stabi lity and in faith fulne ss, and you shall know and cheri sh the Lord. The Lord your God is in the midst of you, a Might y One, a Savio r Who saves ! He will rejoi ce over you with joy; He will rest...

Last night I was given a very vivid dream. As I was walking with a closed black umbrella, passing my van, I noticed a Large Black Snake under my van. Instead of being afraid of the snake I tried to coax it out from under the van with my umbrella. The snake willingly came out and raised up to my height at the tip of my umbrella, straight in front of me and I grabbed hold of his neck. As I squeezed his neck I could feel the muscle shrink and go down to just thin skin. As I squeezed the snake began opening his mouth wider and wider until finally his mouth was completely at 180 degrees with his fangs pointing straight up. Though he struggled, I knew that I was not to let go until I was absolutely CERTAIN he was dead. So, unfortunately, that meant walking around with this snake in my hand. My son comes up to me and the snake and wants to see it. I was shocked that he came so close to it that the fangs poked him in the right temple and eyelid. He cried and the area began to swell; but I sti...

I find often as I take my time with life by NOT getting a ton of credit cards (actually I don't even have one) and NOT getting a mortgage or a loan(except for my student loans.. ugh); that it takes ALOT more time to build a life that is worth even looking at. Though I have VERY LITTLE, I own everything I have. My bank account skims the surface and most people would be terrified to live off of the low balances I live off of. But when you pay cash for everything, it costs you NOW, not later and it shows. I find a certain piousness that comes from people who have what they consider as "wealth". I have been on the down side of many noses. You don't know how often I hear, "why don't you just charge it?" When I say I don't have a credit card they look at me as though I have leprosy. Oh well. Or, "with what you make, why don't you live in a better house or drive a better car?" (YES SOMEONE has actually asked me that!) My answer, I will have th...

This is a post of what the rain looked like on the ranch during Ike. It's not as fierce on camera, but live and in person you could actually hear the crackling sound of trees falling during the night. Overall, it was a memorable experience. I was surprised by the damage though. I had NO IDEA in my safe little spot in the country what the rest of Houston was going through. After the power was out and the generators were going. It became apparent that someone would have to find an open gas station soon. After a few phone calls, I found a friend with the internet and he scouted out Bryan College Station to be the closest place to find gas. The next hot spot was Huntsville. I took a picture of the 4 rows of cars going to and beyond the feeder road in front of Walmart, waiting to fill up. I was very happy to be in the country. I had heard stories of fist fights downtown for gas. Not sure if that was just rumor, but I was happy to be around good people. Everyone I saw during this time we...